Merry (almost) Christmas

My mom was the queen of Christmas. Christmas morning was always filled with present after present and the sweet aroma of cinnamon rolls, and tradition after tradition. Even until I was twenty years old we would have a glorious "tree reveal" Christmas morning. She would go out, turn on the lights on the tree, and make sure each present was placed in such a way our living room could resemble a picture in a magazine. And just after all the presents had been opened and all the wrapping paper ripped there were still the stockings to be opened. Even they held secret presents in-between the chocolates and socks.

This year will be different.

This year the duty of making Christmas just as magical has fallen on my shoulders. Well, mine and my younger sister's.

My dad decided that he was inadequate and couldn't play the role of Santa. In turn he handed the reigns over to us. We were to determine what budget she generally used, buy all the presents for the entire family, wrap them, and a special request was placed to not forget about the stockings.

At first the job was an honor. Then the job was overwhelming. And now I have empathy for my mom all those years. Being the queen of Christmas is hard. Trying to live up to each person's expectations is even harder. And honoring the Christmas of our childhood's is hardest. Don't get me wrong, Christmas is still my favorite holiday, and I now look forward to seeing people's faces when opening the present I searched long and hard for. However, I'm also coming to realize that some Christmas traditions aren't meant to last forever, and not everyone can be a queen of Christmas. So as I place another online shopping order and make yet another To Do list that will sit next to my To Buy list I'm reminding myself that I'm doing this out of love, and even if I won't create the picture perfect Christmas, I will do my best to create a Christmas that honors my mom and all she did to make the holidays everyone's favorite time of the year.